Espantaho: A Horror Film That Fails to Scare but Succeeds in Social Commentary

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Directed by Chito S. Roño and written by Chris Martinez, Espantaho presents itself as a horror film but struggles to deliver the scares expected from the genre. While it excels in tackling heavy themes of female rage and toxic masculinity, the movie falls short of creating genuine fear, leaving horror enthusiasts wanting more.

The Horror That Wasn't There

From the start, Espantaho sets up an eerie atmosphere with its use of pests—balang (locusts), linta (leeches), and daga (rats)—as metaphors for the parasitic nature of toxic masculinity. While the symbolism is clever and the metaphors land well, the execution lacks the tension and spine-chilling moments necessary for a true horror experience. The supernatural elements feel secondary, almost like an afterthought, overshadowed by the heavy-handed drama.

The ghosts and creepy visuals are present, but they never quite reach the level of dread or terror one would expect from a Chito Roño horror film. Instead of delivering scares, the film leans heavily into its social commentary, often at the expense of building real suspense.

A Dramatic Core Wrapped in a Horror Aesthetic

At its heart, Espantaho thrives as a drama with horror elements rather than a horror movie. The complex dynamics between Chanda Romero and Lorna Tolentino's characters are compelling, showcasing how women are often forced to turn against each other because of a man’s manipulative actions.

Meanwhile, Judy Ann Santos shines as a mother, daughter, and partner trapped in societal expectations. Her performance is raw and deeply moving, but again, it feels more suited to a family drama than a horror film. The emotional weight of her character's struggles carries the film, but the lack of frightening moments prevents Espantaho from fully embracing its horror identity.

The Real Horror: Family Greed

While the movie misses the mark on scares, it does succeed in highlighting one universally terrifying reality—family disputes over inheritance and land. In true Filipino fashion, the most unsettling moments of the film don’t come from ghosts or supernatural threats but from the betrayal, greed, and dysfunction within families.

It’s a sharp commentary on how real-life horrors often overshadow fictional ones, but audiences expecting classic horror thrills might feel let down.

Chris Martinez's Sharp Script

Chris Martinez’s screenplay is rich with metaphor and meaning, offering thought-provoking commentary on gender roles, toxic masculinity, and societal expectations. While the themes are well-explored, they often overpower the horror narrative, leaving little room for tension or fear to build.

A Missed Opportunity for True Horror

If Espantaho had fully committed to being a horror film, with the same level of care given to its social commentary, it could have been a standout entry in the genre. Instead, it feels like a powerful drama disguised in horror aesthetics—a film more thought-provoking than frightening.

Should You Watch Espantaho?

If you’re looking for a bone-chilling horror experience, Espantaho will likely disappoint. However, if you’re open to a socially charged drama with horror elements sprinkled in, the film has plenty to offer.

In the end, Espantaho might not keep you up at night with fear, but it will leave you reflecting on the deeply rooted societal issues it boldly addresses.

“And the Breadwinner Is…”: A Missed Opportunity Despite a Promising Core

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“And the Breadwinner Is…” had all the ingredients of a powerful and memorable family film—an A-list comedian in Vice Ganda, a capable director in Jun Lana (known for Die Beautiful), and a core message that resonates deeply with Filipino culture: the sacrifices of the family breadwinner. Yet, somewhere between slapstick humor and heavy-handed melodrama, the film stumbles, leaving behind a product that feels uneven, forced, and, at times, painfully cringeworthy.

A Family Film That Struggles to Find Its Identity

Coming off a Christmas trip abroad, watching a family film with loved ones seemed like the perfect way to cap off the holiday season. The buzz around “And the Breadwinner Is…” suggested a ‘different’ Vice Ganda movie—one that would blend humor with meaningful drama. Unfortunately, the execution fell short of expectations.

The film starts with Vice Ganda’s signature brand of slapstick comedy, but instead of delivering sharp wit and lighthearted laughs, the humor often relies on tired tropes. Jokes about physical appearances, weight, and even death dominate the first half, many of which feel outdated, punching down rather than uplifting. For a seasoned comedian like Vice Ganda, it’s disappointing to see such humor executed without nuance or cleverness.

A Tale of Two Halves

The second half of the film shifts into dramatic territory—a tonal shift that, while promising on paper, feels jarring on screen. Much of the narrative relies on family confrontation scenes, particularly around Vice Ganda’s character discovering betrayal and unfulfilled promises after years of financial sacrifice.

However, the emotional moments fall flat, primarily because of poor pacing and inconsistent characterization. Key confrontation scenes occur at odd moments in the narrative. When Vice’s character learns about the truth behind the ‘multi-level dream house,’ one would expect an immediate, explosive confrontation. Instead, the film drags this moment out, diluting its impact.

Kokoy’s character, in particular, is an enigma. His dialogue in crucial scenes feels out of place, as if shoehorned in to deliver a ‘moral lesson’ rather than flowing naturally from the character’s motivations. This disconnect in timing, delivery, and emotional payoff ultimately robs the film of its cathartic potential.

The Missed Opportunity of a Strong Message

At its heart, “And the Breadwinner Is…” grapples with real, deeply relatable issues—family expectations, sibling rivalry, parental favoritism, and the often-unspoken sacrifices made by LGBT individuals who are frequently seen as their families' default providers. These are themes that could have been mined for profound emotional storytelling.

In a rare bright spot, the moments between Vice Ganda and the younger characters, particularly Argus and the little girl, stand out. Their discussion about calling Vice “MaPa” (a combination of Mama and Papa) touches on identity and respect in a way that feels authentic and heartwarming. Similarly, SB19’s “MaPa” song as part of the film’s OST serves as a perfect emotional anchor.

These glimmers of brilliance, however, are buried under layers of awkward dialogue, misplaced comedy, and undercooked dramatic arcs.

Jun Lana and Vice Ganda: What Went Wrong?

Director Jun Lana has previously shown his skill with emotionally charged narratives (Die Beautiful), and Vice Ganda has proven his box-office appeal in films like Praybeyt Benjamin. Together, they could have created something extraordinary. Yet, “And the Breadwinner Is…” feels like a mismatch of intentions—an attempt to balance Vice Ganda’s comedic persona with Jun Lana’s flair for melodrama.

It seems that the script was the film’s biggest weakness. The dialogues often felt contrived, the pacing uneven, and the emotional beats rushed or delayed.

Final Thoughts: A Film With a Good Heart, But a Flawed Execution

Despite its shortcomings, “And the Breadwinner Is…” does have a heart. Its themes are undeniably important, and there are moments—though fleeting—of genuine emotional resonance. The “MaPa” scene and SB19’s OST are clear highlights.

However, the film ultimately falls short of being the transformative Vice Ganda movie it aspired to be. The humor often misfires, the drama feels forced, and the emotional payoffs lack the impact they deserved.

For audiences seeking light entertainment and fleeting moments of emotional depth, “And the Breadwinner Is…” might still offer some enjoyment. But for those looking for a well-crafted narrative that truly delivers on its promises, this film might leave them wanting more.

Final Verdict: An ambitious but flawed attempt to blend humor and drama. It has its moments, but they are overshadowed by inconsistent storytelling and misplaced humor.

The 12 Days of Christmas: A Feathered Frenzy and a Pear Tree for Every Occasion

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Ah, “The 12 Days of Christmas.” The festive classic that somehow turns a simple act of gift-giving into a logistical nightmare involving livestock, horticulture, and enough performers to start a Renaissance Faire. If you’ve ever stopped to think, "Wait… did someone actually sit down and think this through?"—the answer is no. Clearly not.

But let’s break it down. Apparently, if you Google it (and trust me, I did), every single one of those gifts might actually refer to birds. Yes, all of them. Even the drummers drumming? Birds. Lords a-leaping? Birds. Golden rings? Surprisingly… also birds. Buckle up, because we're diving head-first into this avian conspiracy.

Day 1: A Partridge in a Pear Tree

This one’s easy. The partridge is literally a bird. It’s sitting in a pear tree. A tree that presumably no longer bears fruit because the partridge has claimed it as its feathery throne. And here’s the kicker—partridges don’t even like trees. They’re ground birds. So already, this relationship is off to a rocky start.

Bird Count: 1

Tree Count: 1 (totally overshadowed by the partridge’s refusal to perch correctly)

Day 2: Two Turtle Doves

Ah, turtle doves. Romantic, classic, and incredibly on-brand for a Victorian love story. However, two doves seem practical compared to what’s coming. Honestly, Day 2 still feels like a sane day in this mad gift-giving spree.

Bird Count: 3

Day 3: Three French Hens

French hens. Tres chic! But let’s pause and consider: how French are they, really? Are they wearing berets? Are they critiquing baguettes? Either way, we’re up to six birds. At this point, the recipient’s living room is starting to resemble an aviary.

Bird Count: 6

Day 4: Four Calling Birds

Now, some historians argue that "calling birds" might actually refer to "colly birds," which are… blackbirds. So yes, still birds. Either way, they’re loud. By now, your true love’s house is essentially a Hitchcock film in the making.

Bird Count: 10

Day 5: Five Golden Rings

Plot twist: These aren’t jewelry. Nope. They’re supposedly a poetic reference to ring-necked pheasants. Yes, more birds. Imagine unwrapping what you thought were shiny gold rings and instead being handed five disgruntled pheasants. Romance is dead.

Bird Count: 15

Day 6: Six Geese a-Laying

We’re done pretending. We’re not even hiding the bird theme anymore. Six geese. Laying eggs. Which means this isn’t just six geese; it’s six geese PLUS however many eggs they’ve decided to deposit onto your new Persian rug.

Bird Count: 21 (and a questionable number of eggs)

Day 7: Seven Swans a-Swimming

It’s unclear whether these swans came with water. Did your true love also deliver a pond? Or are these majestic creatures just flopping around on your kitchen tiles? Swans are also aggressive, so good luck making it to the fridge without getting pecked.

Bird Count: 28

Day 8: Eight Maids a-Milking

Finally, a break from the birds! Or… is it? Think about it: what are the maids milking? Could it be… metaphorical "milking birds"? Are these mythical avian creatures with udders? Okay, maybe we’re stretching here, but don’t underestimate this song's commitment to avian chaos.

Bird Count: TBD (depends on what they're milking)

Day 9: Nine Ladies Dancing

Ladies. Dancing. Great! Finally, some normalcy. Or… maybe not. Some theories suggest these "ladies" represent "bird dances." Specifically, exotic birds performing elaborate courtship rituals. Flamingo tango, anyone?

Bird Count: Hypothetically… 37?

Day 10: Ten Lords a-Leaping

Lords are people, right? WRONG. The “lords” could represent cranes or storks doing their hilarious leggy dance moves. Picture ten storks leaping gracefully across your lawn. Aristocratic? No. Entertaining? Absolutely.

Bird Count: 47 (probably wearing little bird-sized waistcoats)

Day 11: Eleven Pipers Piping

Birds again! Piping refers to the piping plover, a small shorebird known for its piping call. Are these little birds playing tiny flutes? In this song, anything is possible.

Bird Count: 58

Day 12: Twelve Drummers Drumming

Surely, this must refer to people. Surely. Nope. Welcome to the world of woodpeckers. Twelve woodpeckers drumming against your walls at dawn. Your true love has officially lost their mind, and your home is now structurally unsound.

Bird Count: 70 (plus countless repair bills)

Final Feathered Tally

So, let’s recap:

70 birds

1 tree

A possible pond

Hypothetical bird milking

At this point, the "true love" in question isn’t expressing affection—they’re starting a wildlife sanctuary. Also, your house probably smells terrible.

Why So Many Birds?

The theory goes that the song is actually a coded message or a memory-and-counting exercise. But personally, I think the songwriter just really liked birds… and chaos.

In conclusion, if anyone tries to woo you with “The 12 Days of Christmas” this year, kindly remind them that avian flu is real, property damage is expensive, and a nice fruit basket works just fine.