Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Trump Tower on Fire



Breaking News: The Trump Tower in New York city is on fire. In literary terms this is called "foreshadowing."

Either Ivanka, Jared, Melania and the rest of the family are choosing a new Pope or the blaze at Trump Tower was reportedly caused by the president’s pants which are frequently, if not always, on fire.

Rumors are circulating that Melania Trump was overheard saying "There is no Melania. Only Zuul."

Or probably Trump spent so much time on aviation safety he neglected the fire safety checks of Trump tower. Probably started with all his hair care products.

It could also be because Baron is trying to barbecue rats again.

But more likely, that fire on top of trump tower is where Frodo is supposed to throw that ring.

I believe that small fire at Trump Tower was his financial lawyers burning the evidence.



Seriously, a small fire broke out on the roof of Trump Tower Monday morning, caused by an electrical box, fire officials say. No injuries reported.

Around 84 firefighters tackled the blaze on the top floor of Trump Tower.

Aerial views show fire at Trump Tower, and people posted video and images to social media, showing smoke rising from the building, which houses both residences and businesses.

There have been no injuries or evacuations, and the President is not currently at Trump Tower.

"There was a small electrical fire in a cooling tower on the roof of Trump Tower. The New York Fire Department was here within minutes and did an incredible job. The men and women of the #FDNY are true heroes and deserve our most sincere thanks and praise!"

That Should Read:

Thank You to the Heroes of the #FDNY (even though my father refused to support a healthcare bill for 9/11 first responders) for so Quickly Responding to the Fire we started at Trump Tower this Morning Frantically Burning Evidence!! Oops!!

I keep wanting to make more joke about the Trump Tower fire but can't get past what an ugly abomination of a structure it is. A drunken Jenga tower of mafia concrete, creepy van window tint and Sauron spraypaint.

Trump Tower can't burn down or melt because it was built out of concrete by fat Tony former head of the most powerful crime family in the city.

Small fire at rooftop of Trump Tower and liberals are all up in arms that President Trump wasn’t killed.

There was a fire at the Clinton’s the other day and as much as we don’t like them you didn’t see Conservatives upset they didn’t die.

There’s this thing called class & respect.

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